More than once in my life, I have had to start over. Whether it be a job change, a house change, a relationship change. The latest change is a daunting one. Ending a relationship to save my sanity and protect myself and children from future disappointment and heartbreak was finally a decision I was ready to make. I had to make it. I am heartbroken that I couldn't keep Two Plus Two together, but I will not take full responsibility.
Addiction hurt our family. Addiction and failure to communicate. This is a lethal combination. Addiction leads to lack of trust and failure to communicate leads to lack of intimacy. How can a relationship survive that? I was hoping that I could hide the pain from the kids enough to allow them to still benefit from a Two Plus Two family.
I could no longer shelter them. Savannah is just too observant and intelligent. She knew. She tried to shelter Addison, which was successful, but I could no longer bear to hear the questions that Savannah was asking about what was going on in our house. It could be hidden no longer.
So, it was time. Time to go from Two Plus Two to just The Hicks Girls. So here I begin anew.
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